rob (jude8098) wrote,

just another tricky day

last toot of afrin, about to embark on a terrible frodoesque journey. Seriously, afrin is bad. like cigarettes. i know i usually come on and ballbag about stuff but this is not a joke.i can't breathe out my nose and my head feels like its going to pop off my shoulders.when you first try it, alone in your apartment, or perhaps driving in your car on some polleny april day, you feel a magical surge of air disappearing up your nose like dirt up a vacuum cleaner. it's the kind of moment you rarely get in life, pure satisfaction. you feel like the 9 dollars you just spent was certainly a fair deal, if not a major coup. so you keep your head down and toot away, praising the scientists who invented such a wonderful product. maybe you've been dealing with a stuffy nose all your life. nothing was ever as strong as your sinuses, no medicine could defeat them. but afrin can. afrin cleans you out. only, the only thing is, is that after three days (it's always three days with things) you can't breathe without it. your membranes or whatever get inflamed inside yr nose and no air can get through. of course, if you still have your spray bottle then a couple toots get you straightened out. first it's every twelve hours but eventually its every three hours. every morning you wake up completely clogged, the inside of your mouth coated in pure grossness. 100% pure. it takes more than usual to clear it out. then you're off living your life with a big bottle in your pocket. god forbid you forget it, or go on storm to texas and have to go without. you would rob a convenience store, knock over an old lady, steal from your mother's purse, anything to get a new bottle. i know this sounds crazy. i dont care. i just hope it doesn't take longer than a week of this suffering to get back to normal. and that i don't break down and buy more. ill try to keep all of you posted (ha ha) if i can, unless i have to retreat to my bunker for the duration.
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